Nope. Listening to it today, it's like I never knew it. It's like I'd never even heard it before.

This seems weird to me. Of course, I once used to know how to play "Dude Looks Like A Lady." And "Couldn't Stand The Weather."

I wonder how many songs have fallen in and out of my head over the years. Hell, there's a whole slew of tunes that I've written that I have no idea how to play anymore.

How much knowledge that seemed essential to you when you learned it is lost to you forever?

Is it possible to get it back, I wonder?

There are days when I wish I could remember how to play Whitesnake's "Still Of The Night"... derivative or not, THAT was a fun song to play.

In some ways I'm reminded of mid-summer in the year 2000, when I was making a similar push to finish the tracking of Any Raw Flesh?. I'd go in to work early so that I could leave early, and I'd get to Darin's by 3 PM or so, and we'd work, work, work. Mostly that was when we were doing vocals, and that was when he had his studio in an office park, rather than in the back yard of his home. That studio was his home at the time. Good memories. Good times. I'm excited to get this thing finished. We've had nice response to the rough mix of "A Kick In The Shin" we posted over at MySpace. Bryan Beller wrote me an email and said he thought it was the best thing I've ever done. I didn't do it by myself, of course, but it was nice to hear. I told him that there are several songs on the new album I like better than AKITS, so maybe this bodes well for the new record being pretty good?

I always feel like there's still time for me to screw things up, even if everything we have thus far sounds great. Darin looked at me like I was a loony when we were talking about the album recently, when I said something like, "...if the album turns out well." He was like, "Whaddaya mean 'IF' it's good?" I dunno what I meant. I don't wanna jinx it. I think it could be by far the best thing I've ever been a part of, but you know.

Next week I'll be in the studio three times after work. I think I'll focus mainly on finishing up vocals on songs that need them. There's a lot of work done, a lot left that needs doing.

I'll try not to mess anything up.

It has a great cast of character actors. A lot of them are playing "types" in this story, but it works. It's a family drama. A sad-sack Dad trying to get a business off the ground, based on an idea that will never take off. An exhausted wife trying to be supportive of her husband, but becoming resentful being the only breadwinner in the family. The sullen, teenaged loner son, who paints murals of Nietzsche in his room and who has taken a nine-month vow of silence. The gay uncle, fresh off an unsuccessful suicide attempt. The bright younger daughter who is obsessed with beauty pageants. The crusty, heroin-addicted grandpa.

We've seen it all before, right?

Well, maybe not the grandpa.

Anyway, this is a combination Road Movie/Everyone Learns A Lesson Movie. It's one of those stories where every character Gains An Important Insight About Their Life, all in under two hours. The family has the kind of impossible weekend together that pretty much only happens in movies.

And yet. It's really well done. It's really heartfelt. It's probably rare that ALL of these characters would reach a crisis point ALL at the same time, but... hey, this is what movies and stories are for.

The movie is funny. Parts of it had me wanting to hide under my chair (the pageant stuff at the end). But the movie is about perservering against the odds. That you've gotta keep doing what feels right even in the face of derision. And that your family is there, in the end, to catch you when you fall, to cheer you on when you succeed, and to support you, no matter what happens.

So it was one of the better trailers I've seen in a long time.

Then people I know went to see it, and started telling me that it was great, and that I'd probably enjoy it. My Dad. Beta Girl.

So, one evening after work I walked over to a theater in Bellevue and bought a ticket.

And I had a great time. I still have no real impression of Anne Hathaway as an actress, simply because I'm always just in awe of her hotness in every scene. I think she was good. She sure looked fantastic. On the other hand, Meryl Streep was frickin' amazing. She deserves a nod for Best Supporting Actress next year for this one. It should be no surprise to anyone at this point that Meryl kicks ass, but hey. She really impressed me. She made this movie way better than it should have been. The other standout was Stanley Tucci, and whoever that actress was who played the other assistant in Meryl's office.

I'll still add this one to my Netflix queue when it comes out - and maybe I'll be able to figure out if Anne Hathaway is any good in it or not. We'll see.

Well. That sucks. At least the Storm made a game of it after not showing up for the first three quarters. Super Hero Lauren Jackson nearly willed the Storm to a win all by herself in the fourth quarter, getting her team to within one point.

Alas, Sue... (ah, Sue.) My girl Sue had a couple of big misses at the end that probably win the game if they go in.

This hurts. Sorry, LA won, but they aren't the better team.

They aren't going to beat Sacramento, anyway. Honestly, the Storm probably wouldn't have had a chance against the Monarchs, either.

Ugh. Nine months until next season. And will next season be the last season for the Storm in Seattle?

My stomach hurts.

True story: this year during the pre-season Beta Girl and I went to the QFC (local grocery store for you outta-towners) to see Sue at an appearance she was making there (yes, I know this makes me sound like a stalker). We stood in line to get her to sign some poster they were giving away free. When it was our turn, the first thing I did was ask her if, having had her beak broken in each of the last two seasons, was she going to wear that plastic mask this season, in case. She gave me the Evil Eye in return, and knocked on the nearest wood-like thing nearby. I wished her good luck.

When she crumpled to the court again yesterday, blood flowing out of her nose, all I could think of was, If she'd been wearing that mask...

Anyway. She dodged a bullet this time. Sue: I know wearing a hot, sweaty plastic mask while playing point guard has got to suck worse than things that suck a lot. But please: just wear the freakin' thing from now on.

Do I really need to review this one?

Well, that's one. The Storm beat the hated LA Sparks tonight in the first game of their first-round playoff series. LA is the #1 seed in the conference, the Storm is the fourth, and last.

But the Storm took 2 of 3 from LA during the season - and the one they lost, they lost by one point.

The blond Aussie above is Lauren Jackson, AKA The Warrior, AKA Arguably The Best Female Basketball Player In The World. She is playing on a stress fracture in her left leg. She's been playing on it all season.

She's playing with a broken leg. And tonight she scored 22 points, and outplayed probable league-MVP Lisa Leslie of the Sparks. On one memorable play, Lauren stuffed a Lisa Leslie jump shot that turned into a Storm fast break.

Lisa Leslie is amazing. She's Arguably The Greatest Female Basketball Player Of All Time. We LOVE to hate her in Seattle. When the LA starting lineup is introduced at the game, the snarky Key Arena sound crew have started playing "Darth Vader's theme" over the PA. It's awesome.

So while Sue Bird will always have my heart and undying loyalty - my fave player is Lauren Jackson, or LJ. She's a freakin' superhero. Good on ya, matey.

Now let's blow this thing and go home.

It was completely anti-climactic, really. They didn't even try to talk me out of it. I'll be buying one online somewhere else.

Can you imagine what it might be like if she keeps this up for 10, or 20 years? Apparently she's continuing to work on this project. Amazing.

Sue Bird is hot.

So when I discovered that Will Ferrell was making a movie skewering NASCAR and the folks that love it, of course my reaction was: I AM SO THERE.

In some ways, watching smart people make fun of not-so-smart people in a movie is the sort of thing one can feel some major-league guilt about, especially if, as I recently mentioned in another entry, one is an ex-Catholic like me.

I decided that that was just the price I had to pay in this case.

The movie, like most Will Ferrell comedies, is pretty slight, plot-wise. If Will Ferrell makes you giggle when he's just standing still, like he does to me, then you're probably going to like it. The fact that Freaks & Geeks producer Judd Apatow helped produce this is another reason that I had to go see this. I had a great time. The movie is completely predictable, like all movie comedies tend to be. There are individual moments of hilarity that make sitting through the slow bits worthwhile. John C. Reilly is hilarious. Everybody is hilarious. Sacha Baron Cohen plays Will Ferrell's nemesis, a gay French race car driver who drinks espresso and reads The Stranger by Camus while racing. He may be the funniest thing in the movie, and really makes me look forward to the upcoming Borat movie he's doing.

I wasn't familiar with the story the film is based on, but it's cool paranoid sci-fi stuff, set in a world just a few years from now. There's nothing that happens that seems unfeasible to me, and the idea of the "scramble suits" is so freaking cool. It's pretty much those suits alone that truly justify the reason for making this an "animated" film, and the animation for them is really effective.

I've seen a lot of harsh-to-mixed reviews for this flick, but I gotta say, I really dug it.

We walk over to some ancient computer workstation where he's going to "print me an invoice." This is Large Electronic Retailer-ese for Now I'm Going To Try And Get You To Buy A Bunch Of Services You Don't Need. I gritted my teeth and let him do his spiel. He asks me if I'm aware of the problem of "dead pixels" with LCD screens. No, I say. I add that I've had an LCD screen for some time now (smaller, though), and that I've never had any problem with it. He nods, not because he was paying attention to me, but because it's his cue to continue to try to talk me into buying some extra "service coverage."

I smile.

He tells me more about the apparently common problem of "dead pixels." He then asks me to buy $40 of extra service coverage, that will prevent me from having to spend even more than that shipping my new screen to the manufacturer for repair. He says that for monitors in this price range, it's only a small percentage of the price, and well worth the investment. He adds that he himself had bought this VERY SAME COVERAGE when he bought a similar item.

I say, No, I don't want this "service." I tell him that if I get the monitor home and there are "problem pixels", that I will just bring it back to This Store and exchange it for another one.

He frowns at me. I start getting a little riled, but I remain determined not to raise my voice.

He tries, again, to explain the patently obvious benefits to the $40 extra service. I'm thinking two things: 1. Why are we having this conversation when I already said NO I don't want to pay for this, and 2. The only party who is getting a patently obvious benefit here is The Large Electronics Retailer, who gets an extra $40 from me for an invented "problem" that I will never have to deal with. I start thinking about all of the naive customers who must come in to this store and get snookered by all this bullshit.

He says: I can't understand why you don't see the value in this.

I finally snap.

DUDE, I say (Yes, I actually called him "dude"). I continue: I am finished with this conversation. I said I don't want to pay for this $40 "service." I don't understand why when I say NO, that it doesn't get to mean NO.

He frowns at me.

I say, If we can't be done having this stupid conversation, I'm going to just walk away from this sale right now.

He tries to call my bluff. He says, OK, walk away.

Now I'm REALLY mad. Because I want the stupid monitor, and it's sitting right there on the floor ready to go. The reason I'm not carrying it up to the registers right now is because this guy wants to haggle with me. I probably should have walked away. Gone someplace else. But that would actually be more of a pain in MY ASS than it would be for this spiky-headed little twerp. I was not going to let him win.

He says: I'm just trying to do YOU a favor.

I say, I'M just trying to buy the damn monitor. I finally raise my voice a little: JESUS CHRIST, DUDE!

Now he looks wounded. He relents. He says, FINE. I'm going to "print your invoice now." He stalks off to some printer somewhere. The monitor sits on the floor, in its box, looking at me.

And now I'M FEELING GUILTY about yelling at this guy, for STANDING MY GROUND. And I get even more angry. Why am I feeling bad for HIM?

I guess the Catholicism stays with you, even when you believe you've left it behind.

He comes back, we won't look each other in the eye. He staples an invoice to the box. He says, enjoy your monitor.

I say, thanks.

There's an instrumental outro section that comes in about 3/4ths of the way through the song that is just phenominal music. It's very atypical of Meshuggah, in that in addition to being huge and brutal (par for the course), it's also beautiful and sad and haunting. It's my favorite bit of Meshuggah music.

Great band.

Mom, you wouldn't like them. They don't write any "nice" songs. ;-P

I'm swapping apartments this week - moving four floors down in the same downtown building, into a larger apartment. I took Tuesday off from work to sign the new lease and start moving my stuff. A move like this isn't like a "regular" move - I didn't even box up any stuff. I borrowed a cart from the concierge and just started taking loads of stuff down there one load at a time. I've carried almost everything that I can manage on my own, and after tonight's Storm game the Betas are going to come by and help me move the really big stuff - the box springs and mattress and the big 'ol sofa. I'll spend the rest of the week cleaning up and finding places for things in the new space.

At work this week we reached a milestone on the work we're doing - so it's hurry up and wait time at the day job again. The fact that I have stuff to do at home is making it harder for me to just sit here and do nothing, even though I'm getting paid very well to do said nothing. More and more I find I'd rather NOT be paid to do nothing, and have my time for myself, even though it would hit me in the pocketbook. Having more of my time be own seems to be better for me on a purely maintaining my sanity level.

Then there's the ongoing saga of the not-yet-completed new album. Nothing much can really be helped on that front - just need some time in the studio. And for that, I need to be able to have some money to dedicate for that. Looming over the money situation is the fact that I still don't know what I owe for my 2005 taxes. An extension for filing them was put in on my behalf in April. That comes due in October. It's my own fault for not knowing - I haven't called my accountants and demanded that they tell me, for one thing. I've sent several very nice emails asking about it, and I always get a nice reply that says something like We'll get right back to ya on that! The fact is, these people have always been so cool to me, and they have a long history of bailing me out of IRS issues, so I'm loath to get all upset at them on this one. The fact is, I'm betting they're going to give me some Very Bad News, and part of me just doesn't want to hear it. I always think that this year I'm really coming out ahead financially.

We're not doing any gigs with the band right now - and after recording basics for "Dusty Demonatrix" the other week, I couldn't really figure out what we needed to be rehearsing for in our typical "twice a week" engagements. We cancelled a bunch of practices as a result. I took the time and finished up a demo for a song we've been batting about called "Handbasket." I presented it to the band a few days ago and they like it - so it looks like we'll be tracking that one for possible inclusion on the new album. We could take more gigs - but they'd almost certainly be Wednesday night at midnight shows (I've turned two of these down recently). I know you're supposed to have to do those shows - paying dues and all that - but... do we need to do them now? Pete and Lizzy are really busy with Charlie Drown anyway.

The people I'm working for now (on contract) asked me last week if I'd be interested in being hired on by them full-time. This company is viewed as an "up-and-comer" in publications that give a shit about such things. Wired magazine just had them in the top 20 of their 40 Companies To Watch, or whatever.

I told them "maybe."

Having now been a freelance contractor with his own corporation for two years, there are pluses and minuses to both ways of working. I think right now, staying a contractor just eeks out a win in a head-to-head comparison.

I never wanted a "career" in anything. I never had a "career plan." That's one of the reasons Higher Education and I didn't mix well - I just couldn't see the point of it for me. Everyone would say, "Well, it's OK if you're not sure what field you want to go into, just take the required classes and you can figure it out later." I sort of tried this approach - I lasted a semester-and-a-half at William & Mary. What I learned there required no input from any professor - I just can't go through the motions. And I'm certainly not going to PAY MONEY to do it.

So this attitude rises up in me every time a company I work for likes me and indicates an interest in hiring me full-time. On one level, it's flattering. It's nice that the work I'm doing is good enough to generate such an interest. That's a nice little ego stroke for the 'ol Yogster, and I'll take it.

But invariably, when getting a corporate job (or "Joining Our Team" is how most of the companies put it) the discussion turns to My Career Goals and Where I See Myself In Ten Years and Other Stupid Shit That Is Completely Irrelevant To My Life Thank You Very Much. A corporate job is an "invitation" to things like Annual Company Meetings and even worse, Annual Salary Reviews. And as all of you poor corporate hacks already know, the Salary Review requires you to fill out ESSAY QUESTIONS about - you guessed it - MY CAREER GOALS and all the other stuff.

Why is this management style EVERYWHERE around here? Did every American company attend the same management seminar or something? They certainly seem to have drunk from the same Kool-Aid trough.

Now, I know damn well that even the most outwardly enthusiastic employee here probably hates all this stuff as much as I do. But they have developed an exceptional ability to "Fake It 'Til They Make It." I envy them. I wish I could do it. I can't. At. All.

Also, switching to a full-time gig here would almost certainly require me to take a pay cut. This is justified by all of the other "perks", like health plans, etc. that I currently pay for myself.

On the other hand, being President of Wonky Enterprises, Inc. is not all fun-n'-games. The fact that I feel like I'm constantly having to go to ANOTHER quarterly tax appointment is a pretty big drag. And as my as-yet-unknown 2005 Tax Bill attests, the supposed "tax benefits" of being a corporation haven't really materialized for me.

But there are no Annual Salary Reviews at WEI. And when I'm done with a contract, I can file for unemployment and sit on my butt for two months doing whatever I want.

Hmmm.

They asked me about hiring on last week, and I told them honestly that I would consider it. I didn't leap up and dance a joyful jig on the conference table, that's for sure - and I haven't heard a peep about it since. Maybe I didn't show enough enthusiasm for Joining The Team. We'll see.

I might drink the Kool-Aid this time.